Today is Cinco de Mayo... another American made holiday to celebrate getting drunk for no real reason. St Paddy's Day being the other one. And of course like a true post college American, I have participated in the d ays' festivities... Drinking since noon and its going on 11 pm currently, so cheers...
Today bothers me most because of a convo Panda Head and I had earlier today. He was bothered by the satirical humor that has been attached to this holiday. How most people just celebrate to make fun of Mexicans. While I totally agreed with him, today has become a horrible way to pick on a minority group, I wasn't as bothered as he was. My rebuttal was St Patrick's Day. People have been using March 17 to pick fun at Irish people for years. 'Wear green or get pinched, Drink beer all day long, kiss a ginger', these are just a few silly things that people swear will give them good luck. So yea the Irish culture has been made a fool of forever, sorry if I don't feel bad for Mexicans today.
So this weekend is my birthday. I forgot how old I was turning because I have celebrated my 21st for the past 3 years. (hahahaha, totally not joking) But I haven't even thought about my birthday. This weekend is Mother's Day and going home to see my Mommie Dearest is the only thing I care about. I miss my Mommie, Truly I do. Her and my sister Alissa are honestly the reason I am still living today.
These two women have given me everything from the last bit of food in their fridge to the shirts out of their closets. My sister Alissa and I haven't always gotten along, actually we never got along growing up. We had nothing in common. She was a house person; I thrived in the yard. She played the saxophone; I played soccer. She was a history buff: I performed in plays. She was in the Honor Society; I skipped class.
There was seriously nothing in us that we shared other than DNA, and even that was questionable.
The older I got the further apart Alissa and I became. I just wanted her to like me. God we argued over everything and I mean everything. One time when I was in middle school my mother left for work. It was near Christmas time and we have gifts to wrap to take with us to my God-mother's house. Mommie asked me to wrap them before she left. So after I did my home work I went to the living room to wrap them. Somehow an argument between Alissa and I transpired and the next thing I know we are fighting about who is going to wrap the presents. Like what the fuck? Hindsight who cares who wrapped them, just get the wrapped before the weekend.
Anyway... Alissa and I started shoving and snatching the roll of paper and she ends up slamming it into my eye. She hit me with a roll of wrapping paper. Needless to say I obtained a paper cut and it busted my eye. I told Mommie the next morning that I had tripped and hit the door handle. I never really wanted her to get into trouble. So I lied. But like any mother. Mommie knew the truth.
I spin this story to show how much we didn't get along. It was an ongoing thing between us. She threw lamps at me. I even got hit with a Calculus book. She slammed it into my head from across the room. I swear she should have played softball, her aim was on point... dear god...
But with all the shyt we went through growing up she was still the person I wanted to like me. All the time I just begged for her approval.
I joined the marching band because I wanted to be closer to her. I hated that shyt, but she was in it so I thought it would bring us closer. It didn't. She hated me for it. I took her shine.
So many differences...
But the point of all this is to say how much I love her. How much she means to me. My sister has been there for me so many times when no one else was. Times when I was too scared to call my Mother, times when my dad broke my heart, times when my bank account didn't exist.
My sister worked so hard to give the greatest senior year. I had all the stupid items and commemorative mug and pictures to hand out. She killed herself to make sure I graduated college. Working newspapers all night and picking up a second job at a gas station during the day to ensure she had extra money to send me.
Alissa has been my lifeline more times than not... and I really have no clue where I would be without her. Mommie and Alissa deserve the world, but all I can do for them is show up for Mother's Day. I have no money, no gifts nothing at all. All I can do is go see them. And only for a few hours...
As horrible as that sounds I am so excited. I can't wait. This weekend is not about me, my birthday quit being about me years ago. This weekend is a chance to see my Mother and Sister... and for that I am thankful. May is a wonderful month, a chance to tell all the women in the world they mean the world... but Alissa and Donna are true gems among gems... I love them and I owe my life to them.
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